The Surgery

I will disclaim: the male readers may want to jump over to Espn.com. Just saying.

5 years ago I gave birth to a sweet 9lb 12oz baby boy. No one knew he was that large. My doctor sure didn't know it or she wouldn't have decided to remove him the way she did, leaving me with a very long recovery and scar tissue. Also, the sneezing, coughing, and laughing was alarming.

When I got pregnant with Emaline (8lbs 12 oz), I struggled mentally thinking about the birth of another child, what it would do to my body. I was led to a wonderful doctor who monitored me and the size of my baby and suggested we go the route of a c-section to not do further damage to my body.

Done.

Baby number 3 (7 lbs, 6 oz), c-section done. But with the pregnancies came pressure to some of the organs in my body. After a long day of shopping, or being on my feet, I would feel 'discomfort' and need to sit down. After Bowden, I really wanted to start exercising to get rid of this baby weight. One night, during a family walk, I told the fam to keep on and that I was going to jog the rest of the way home. I made a few steps and knew something was wrong. I waited a few more steps and tried again. Same thing occurred, pain in the female region, only to be described as something or somethings were falling out.

I went to my gyn for the good ol annual. I mentioned to him the problems with my bladder, and the pain I felt during my jog. He examined me. I already knew my options for the bladder but when the doctor explained to me about the jogging pain... I felt faint. I actually had to lay back down because I thought I was going to pass out. I am 33. This sounds like something I should be dealing with in 20 years!

Dr. New and I discussed the 'quality of life' term. I so want to run with my kids, which I have never done unless planned. I want to jump up and down, play soccer, chase the kids, sneeze! with out having incontinence, plus my 'other' organs need to stay where they are suppose to be.

SO, this past Tuesday I went in for surgery. I was an emotional wreck. I kept telling them that I am nauseated, and anxious. Anyone who would listen I told them, nauseated and anxious. I was fearful. My friends were praying for me, this was a big decision for me. My kids are so small. I won't be able to lift them for 6 weeks! After Stacey hugged me and they began to roll me back....I guess I fell right to sleep.

Dr. New lifted my bladder, vagina, and rectum. Sound fun? The urologist inserted a sling on my bladder. Dr. New also removed a lot of scar tissue, more than he expected that I had from Parker's birth. One of the side effects to anesthesia I have is that I itch. I ITCH like crazy! No medicine they gave me would take away the itch. That has been hard.

My kids are at camp Nana this week, and next week they will go to Aunt Dee's and Mammy's. Then after that I have had lots of friends offer to help during the day with the little ones. It is hard to not have them around, but very emotional if I think about not being able to help Bowden if he needed me. Or if he hurt me. I would not want to upset him. Stacey has been amazing. He has been very understanding to the pain I have felt over the years, and prayed for me during this decision making process. My grandmother has been here for the past few days helping me get around.

So there you have it. The mysterious surgery. When I was doing some research I learned that they really don't know statistics on how many women have what I have, because women don't talk about it. Women don't tell their doctor what is happening to their body or their friends. I hope that me blogging about this, does open a door to someone else who may need to talk to their doctor, or to someone else about what is going on in their body. They aren't alone and they don't have to 'live with it'.

If you are reading this and can't believe I wrote all this on the Internet, just remember I am on some pretty major pain medicine! Thank you all for your prayers!