It's December 21st!

How did that happen!? AND you know what... my CHRISTMAS CARDS ARE NOT IN THE MAIL! It's a long story, but let's just say I received my cards from the printer, addressed ALL of them. Decided I didn't like my card. Recycled all of them. Reordered and have just finished REaddressing Christmas cards. I received about 10 cards in the mail today that I didn't have on my list from previous years, so I am addressing more. I've stamped, and will be dropping in a box somewhere tonight because when I hurried myself to the mailbox, mail had already run. Cards just haven't been my thing this year!

The RASH

I took the big kids lunch on December 12th, it was a Wednesday. Emaline was a bit quiet, but I really didn't think much about it. She ate her lunch, and was a bit rosy cheeked, but I thought she was chapped. It had been cold. After she ate with me, she went and sat down with her class. A teacher in the cafeteria walked by her and checked her for fever. I was seriously 10 feet away. I was a bit offended by it. But oh well- she was rosy cheeked. Picture on left was taken AT LUNCH.

By the time my sweet dear friend brought her home I knew something was not quite right. Her cheeks were BRIGHT RED! They were very warm to the touch. Nothing else was wrong. Nothing. She looked horrible though. I sent a text to my boss and my co worker that I didn't know what I was dealing with and may not be at work on Thursday. We would just have to wait and see what she looked like.

Then we found it on her legs! OH NO! I sent pictures to my mom and to a few friends asking if it was chicken pox!  They all said it didn't look it.

In the middle of the night, she crawled into our bed, and was burning up! We got her some fever medicine and went back to bed agreeing school wasn't happening. Once we actually got up and turned on the light, we saw this!

HER FACE WAS GLOWING!  GLOWING RED! We decided to take her to the doctor and have this checked out! This is what she looked like at the doctor. We got in at 8:30. As we walked down the hallway at the doctor, everyone stopped and looked at her. I felt horrible for her. HORRIBLE. Our favorite doctor that we didn't get into on this visit, saw her and actually volcalized, OH WOW, what is going on here?

The doctors decided they really didn't know what it was. They went ahead and checked for strep and just about anything else they could think of. They said probably it was a virus, that we were seeing the end of. Kind of like hand foot mouth. She could have gone to school even THAT day. Uh, NO. Do you see her? I would have gotten called every time a new teacher saw her. The doctors told us that it would get worse before it got better. I did ask at what point do I decide enough is enough and was given details when I would need to have her seen again.

 When we took Bowden to preschool we ran into SANTA! Santa was not scared of her.

When we got home she wanted to soak her feet.  NO PROBLEM sweet girl.

I started documenting the rash daily. This picture was her feet on Thursday night.

And her legs.

We decided we would see what she looked like on Friday before we decided about school. This is what she looked like!

SO, we kept her home again on Friday, I mean, check out her arm at the bottom of the picture, as well as her face! Daddy brought us some Hot chocolate!
Her legs on Friday morning.

Arms on Friday.

Legs Friday afternoon.

Legs Saturday morning.

Back Saturday morning.

Legs Saturday night. I thought it was getting better but then I realized the redness had just engulfed her entire leg, the only un-rashed part is at the top by her shorts.

It did start getting better. It seemed to last 2 weeks. Poor girl. She never complained OR ITCHED! It didn't ITCH thank the Lord!

Here we are singing Christmas Carols through our elf snow village.

Black Thursday night!

So on our way home from Waxahachie on Thanksgiving Day, my HUSBAND decides it would be a good idea to stop by Sears and buy a dishwasher for our new kitchen from his parents for our CHristmas present. Bowden luckily had fallen asleep and Parker went in with Stacey, so that left Emaline and I sitting in the car for....

for....

for..... 3 HOURS! YES! 3 HOURS! We had fun taking fun pictures of ourselves. The dishwasher, well, we just got it! ONE MONTH LATER! It was kind of a nightmare dealing with Sears. We have purchased from them before and had great customer service, for this time, NOT SO MUCH! 1 month later we got a dishwasher. After we called, and Stacey went up there, and he called, and he called.....  I now have a nice dishwasher. Wonder about how they compensated.... well, I got a $5 off coupon to use on my next visit! OUCH. Thank you Sears.

I'm a magnet

A magnet to weird things happening to me! I am a magnet to bees, although not stung. Wasps land on my arm, but do not sting. Mosquitos think I am a buffet when Stacey can stand right beside me and not get a nibble. This weekend- it's something that liked me. Sometime on Friday I was a snack to some creature. I've had throbbing, hardness, and discomfort. This is a picture from today. Gross. Any ideas what it is??? My guess is a spider!!!

I am not alone in my thoughts

Thank you all for your texts, emails, and comments. It seems as I am definitely not alone with these feelings and that we have to stop satan from telling us these lies.

I have amazing friends. Great friends. I have an amazing Lord who loves me and cares for me- who is my BFF. I have set some goals and am praying about my grownup girlfriends. Grownup Girlfriends is a book I read many years ago, which uses the bucket analogy when talking about your friends: Bucket #1, Bucket #2, Bucket #3..... It was a good example. I think of it often. I think I may need to go back and read it!

Girls, we have to watch our thought closets.  We need to use TRUTH to fight off  the... I'm not good enough STUFF!

Thought Closet

It seems I have so much to catch up on on the ol' blog, but this keeps coming to my mind, so here it is.

Our ladies bible class has been working through a book on your thought closet, called Me, Myself, and Lies. I had a hard time getting into this study. I kind of felt like I was cheating on Beth Moore. I so enjoy her studies, and this one isn't a Beth Moore, so I was kind of resisting what the Lord wanted to chat with me about. Here it is, kind of, the best I know how to share it... please remember I put stuff out there because it is on my heart. I try to be real. I just might come back tomorrow and delete this whole thing regretting hitting publish in the first place. I've done it before.... Oh well here goes.

I struggle with abandonment.  Shew. That felt good. I said it.

Abandonment. Abandonment. Abandonment.

It is getting easier.

Without opening LOTS of old closet doors into my heart and thought closet, I want to just share this on a friend level, but know that my issue goes back.

Since Jenny died I have had a reoccurring thought in my thought closet... and it is unhealthy.  I haven't said it aloud except to Stacey, my prince. I can barely even think about it with out getting a lump in my throat much less actually verbalize this-

I don't have any friends. Okay, I have 2. I mean 3. I can keep doing that until I convince myself otherwise. Let me try to explain this evil thought. Back up a few years ago. Within 2-3 years, a great friend moved out of state, oh wait, make that 3. YES, 3 of my CLOSE friends moved out of state. Not all at once, but they moved. All at different times and not into the same state, but they did move. Then Jenny died. ABANDONED!

Now, I KNOW I have lots of good friends. I still have 2 of my BUCKET #1 girls in town, but as life goes on, and we get busier we aren't in each other daily lives or once a week lives like we used to be. There are times I just want to call a good friend and tell some exciting news, but don't because I know they are probably busy with another friend or busy with their family. INSECURITY anyone?  Satan is loving taunting me about this.

But you know what, I have done it. I've removed myself. I've allowed it. I am keeping a close distance from my friends. PROTECTING myself from hurt. From the pain of losing another friend. It isn't fair- to me or to my friends, or to my Lord.

I am not trusting Him. I am not putting all my faith in Him. I'm not allowing the Lord to bless me through these kingdom sisters and I hope that typing this blog is a start.

At Jenny's birthday party, she told me I was hospitable. Well, I used to be. I can't remember when I actually friends in my home for something other than haircuts! I used to love to have friends over and eat and chat, but just haven't. I even TOLD people I was going to have them over all summer. The kids and I made a list of new families that we have made friends with in our town from their school and families from our church to have over. It was going to be hospitable Fridays, and I did not follow through. Ya' know, because I was sure they were too busy to come so we never set a date. I am sure they think I am crazy. Not that I am on a search for a new BFF, but as I said out loud at lunch today with Stacey- making new friends is hard stuff when you have armor of steel. (BTW, we were coming home from a fantastic church small group retreat with some precious families and women!). When Parker overheard me, and he told me that it was hard for him too. I tried to hold back my tears hearing him talk about it, but when Stacey (and the Holy Spirit) was done, P and I were in good places. I just need to start removing some of my protection and allow the Spirit to work.

Now, I just may delete this by the morning, but it sure felt good to write it. Does anyone else ever feel this way? Probably not. It's probably me being one tired camper ALSO recovering from Jenny's Run for Hope. I know I can't live in the past... so there is HOPE for the FUTURE!

Bowden napping in chair

 

Don't you nap this way?

Son mom date

This is actually from over a month ago! We had a Mother Son movie night! Parker has begged our children's minister for years for something like this and Susan finally came through. I mention years and some of you may be wondering how Susan can be our minister if we have only been at this church for over a year... well, she has been at the church where I have taught preschool for 8 years. ANywhoooo,  Parker asked me to wear a skirt, so I did. We went to dinner at Subway, BUT on the way to Subway we encountered a conversation that I was hoping we would have with Stacey, and in a couple of years, but no such luck! This is how it went down!

"Mom, you know how roosters fertilize hen's eggs, well, how do boys to that to girls?"

silence

Yep, good ol' Animal Planet and NatGEO Wild.... and there I am talking about fertilization and roosters and lions and babies. I tried to dance a bit around it, but I really would rather him hear it from me than someone else, right? So, using the same examples he gave me, I told him. He 'got it' when watching tv and how babies were made, but the human part just didn't sync. It does now. 

We ate our Subway, then headed to the church building where my date opened the door for me and served me my favorite candy and popcorn! If he even thought I needed something, up he went to make sure I had what my heart desired. It was a great night! Birds and the bees, and hens and all!

Parker's BIG Family

Parker wants 5 kids- Austin a boy, twin girls Aubrey and Audrey, Blake  and lastly a girl named Cassie. If you have a daughter close in age and she agrees to these condition, just let me know and we can arrange something!

Comfiness

I don't want to forget this morning as I climbed into the recliner with this sweet boy he told me:

"Mom, I love your comfiness. I like your skin."

Oh how I love him! I love how he makes code words daily to mean different things. Like 'cockle doodle squirrel' means I'm ready for you to wipe my bottom. Or (insert weird squishy sound with mouth) means to please come turn on the TV. He keeps me on my toes. He does it with the kids as well. If they want out of the car at the door which he sits- they must give him the password: rocks pearsons Bowden. Sometimes it is just Bowden Rocks, other times not. The kids play along very well. We love the gift from God he is!

A tough night-

I can't even think about it, my oldest will be in 3rd grade tomorrow! THIRD GRADE! This may be harder on me this year than all the rest because this is the level I taught. I was a third grade teacher- and now Parker will be in third grade! LORD HELP ME! I can still smell the kids after recess if I close my eyes! Third grade is the best! The kids still love their teacher but are becoming more and more independent. They truly start growing up and developing their own sense of belonging. I have big prayers for this guy. HUGE. Now, I was too lazy to scan, so here are a few pictures of pictures!

My mid life crisis!

Yep- that is me! Shocking- right? Well, my kids asked me to do it! And why not!?

This kid is mine!

I can blame him on Stacey all I want, but this kid is mine. I confess- I'm a picker. I love to peel sun burns! Yesterday Bowden got comfortable and began picking my feet. I used to pick my grandmothers feet. I know- I'm gross. But guess what? So is Bowden and he is all mine!!!!!!!

August 3rd

 

 On August 3rd I did something. I accomplished something. I cried. I proved something to myself. It doesn't sound like much, but I did it. I attached this tandem to my bike. Big deal? Yes.

I had to remove the carrier rack on my bike. I had to remove the tandem from Stacey's bike. THIS WAS HARD! It had been on it for 6 months and was wedged on there. We skyped Stacey once. I declared we weren't going on a bike ride, a few times. I cried. I tried to use a socket thing, but didn't need to. Have I mentioned I cried? Then Stacey told us about this super cool tool that I needed and where it was, much better. I did it! We went on a fabulous bike ride.

Did I mention it was Jenny's birthday?  Oh, and Stacey is outside working on our garage as I type. So don't talk about it behind my back JACK! And yes, my car is still smashed in the back. It's getting close to being like that for 1 year. Cool. At least everyone knows its me! And.... I put that tandem on my bike all by myself!

What have you accomplished lately?

Are we teaching respect and consideration?

Warning, a SOAPBOX is coming!!!

We attend a local movie theater during the summer each week where the movies are about .50 each, CHEAP! We have gone for years, even when I was carrying a certain 4 year old in the belly. We went to see some box office titles from the year before, or even 2 years. All the same, we loved going and I would refill my souvenior cup for $1 and buy a small popcorn and divide it up into 2 other brown lunch bags that I would bring from home so we can all have some.

I used to LOVE our movie dates. Such a fun cheap way to provide entertainment for my family.

Over the years, I have noticed a change. (please don't tell me it is because I am getting older, I just might smack you).

It has gotten SO LOUD in the movies! I mean LOUD! I remember when Bowden was an infant, I would try to get to the movies early, and wheel my stroller up to the front row, where there was space for a handicap person for a couple of reasons. I wanted to be able to get out quickly if he woke up and was not happy or if he needed to be walked I could just walk up and down the hallway and still see my 2 other jewels enjoying the movie. When Bowden got older, and was mobile, but not ready to be entertained for the whole 1.5 hours, same thing. I would either sit on the first row of stadium seating, or with friends but be on the end of a row or on the lower level so if he needed to run, we wouldn't distract others. If he got loud I could exit the theater for a few minutes and return, again to spot my jewels. My older kids knew this as well. I even remember once when I took all of us and left the movie because I couldn't get Bowden to obey, but I wasn't going to ruin the entire movie theater experience for the other families.

Do I think others should sit where I sat, and do as I do? NO.

What I do think.... is where has the consideration and respect gone?

I am doing a bible study right now about disciplining your children, and one of the lessons is on interrupting. We are all guilty. I even did it to a friend last night! I quickly realized what I did stopped talking. The bible study tells us that if we continue to allow our children to interrupt, we are teaching them that what they have to say is more important than my conversation, or their sisters, or their teachers.... Yes, I know that IT MIGHT BE if someone is bleeding, or vomiting, and or needs to be rushed to the ER or 911 needs to be called.  ANYWHO.... back to the movies.

I do not enjoy my movie days as much any more. I do love hearing my kids and other kids laugh out loud at the movies! I love it! I love to hear them develop their own sense of  humor and enjoy the story lines. I do not enjoy hearing children scream for minutes upon minutes in the movie theater. Over and over. I do not enjoy hearing babies cry for minutes upon minutes. I do not enjoy hearing toddlers throw tantrums over and over and over, same kid, for going on 5 minutes scream at their mother yelling NO. I have even prayed for that mom, and the stress they may be under or in dealing with a strong willed child. I got one. I get it. BUT GET OUT OF THE MOVIE THEATER! Get your kid under control, and then come back and enjoy. I've even watched in the area of the screaming to see if the mom is headed out of the theater and guess what... NOPE! She is sitting there, probably threatening, bribing, trying to shove a passy in the mouth....which I HAVE DONE! I'm not really trying to say these women are not great parents, we have ALL been there. But when these quick soothers do not work.... I hope you understand what I am saying.

Please be respectful of my time with my kids as well. Yep, I also get that you don't want to miss the movie. I may or may not have almost made my kid wet her pants because I didn't want to miss a part in a movie we had not seen. Guilty, but you know, I remembered, we could rent it, borrow from a friend, and I got over it and panties were dry. 

THAT brings me to story time today at the local library. We were late, actually we had never been before, and happened to be in the library when story time began, so we quietly snuck in about 5 minutes late. Bowden really enjoyed it, and I think he would have liked it better if WE COULD HAVE HEARD IT! COME ON PEOPLE! Today, it wasn't the kids talking, IT WAS THE PARENTS! For real! ONE WAS ON HER CELLPHONE TALKING DURING STORY TIME AT THE LIBRARY!  If it is that important, REMOVE yourself from the floor and the children and take it AWAY from the kids so the kids and YOURS can enjoy the story! And you know what..... I wasn't going to say anything about this to my boys, or ask if they were able to hear it... but our conversation on the way to the car went like this:

Me: Parker, did you enjoy story time?
Parker:Yes, but I couldn't hear it very well, and you know what, IT WAS THE MOMMIES TALKING! That was very rude to the story teller!


Come on WOMEN! Be considerate! Be respectful! Teach that when someone is talking, you listen! Now, I'm off to study "How to keep your 4 year old from throwing the plastic tomato that he is holding to make button soup during story time, then diving to catch it." At least he wasn't talking!

HA HA!

Just a fishing....

 Man, we have been fishing fanatics! Any chance we get we have been going. Last week, on Father's day we went to my grandfather's farm in Krum, Texas and hit the jack pot! As soon as we handed Parker a pole, his first cast, he caught a fish!

 Bowden even held the fish!

 I caught one!

 We caught a few catfish, but they flipped and flopped right off the hooks so no good pictures of the catfish!

 Lauren, Isaiah, and Nana went with us!

 Zayah caught a catfish.

 I caught a catfish!

 Lauren caught a great fish!

 There was also grasshopper catching.

 And a beautiful sunset. By the way, I feel I need to say, these are ALL SOOC- which basically means.... NO PHOTOSHOP! That was seriously the beautiful sunset all by itself!

 We filled this cow bucket with water and collected our fish.

The kids were exhausted! We caught somewhere in the area of 40 fish!!! I would say we had a great time!